I am really dating myself with this reference but since I have put my age into the public record, no secrets will be revealed 🙂 A few weeks ago I stumbled by accident on TV reruns of “That Girl”. It had a fairly short run – but obviously long enough to be in syndication 🙂
http://www.tv.com/shows/that-girl-1966/
“That Girl” never had the power or cultural prominence of “Mary Tyler Moore” but they both informed my childhood view of women – and reinforced the idea that women could be strong and independent that I was so lucky to have as my childhood motif courtesy of my crazy, think-outside-the box family 🙂
“That Girl” was a little extra special for me because the actress featured was named “Marlo”. Obviously my great uncle Elmo must have been a secret fan of the show because he never got that my name ended in an “a”, not an “o”. But “Marla” was a strange Martian name in the small towns of my childhood and “Marlo” was so much closer than all the other “M” names I got called because I was shy and soft spoken so I was grateful 🙂
No doubt Zooey Deschanel is referencing “That Girl” in “The New Girl”. Almost nothing in the 21st century is as “new” as advertised – it’s most often just an update.
Shockingly to me, this is my 100th post! So I thought it should be personal and introspective. I am not Marlo – or Zooey – but I like to think I have updated my own version of “That Girl.”
The show was a cheesy trifle so I suspect my version of “That Girl” is a little deeper than the producers of the 60s would have been envisioning…
I think I am better at the “that” part than the “girl” part. In my family, there were only two offspring. Whether nature, nurture or divine intervention, I was happy to be the substitute son while my sister revelled in everything girlie.

paris early days
She embraced pink, skirts, jewelry… I refused to wear pink on principle. I drove my mother to the edge of madness by wearing the same pair of brown sweatpants during high school so many times they started to disintegrate. Finally, at age 31, when the man I wanted to be perfect enough to marry proved to be a bit more challenging, I finally succumbed to my mother’s pressure to pierce my ears… I think it was my first girlie moment – changing my appearance to mark frustration with a relationship milestone…
The years go by… and all of us grow up… even if it takes a while… so I am scribbling this wearing a skirt, fuschia tights and special edition 007 Swarovski earrings cool enough to get a thumbs up from the gorgeous Parisian hostess at the restaurant.
It took over three decades but I eventually figured the “that” part of “that girl” was the most interesting part. A four-letter word with all kinds of meaning attached.
I only saw one re-run but I think the concept is “That Girl” is memorable. She is not lost in the crowd. So, if you aspire to be “That Girl” you are going to have to be interesting…
I’m not sure I have totally achieved that goal yet. But I am making progress!
As part of my spectacular 50th year (only a few months left), I relived my Hermes experience. In the strange loop that is my life, my first Hermes visit happened when I ran off to Paris for the first time on my own just as I about to embark on a surreal love affair that would result in my European marriage.
In those days I had a regular job – or the kind of irregular permanent job that meant I worked at least 60 hours a week every week so taking vacation time was practically impossible and my best hope was over the Christmas holidays. I had just met the German guy and we were trading emails… back in the old days when we had to write them at work on our lunch break… but it made the communication more exciting. He had just bought an apartment and, being a practical German engineer, wasn’t ready for me to descend on the exact dates I could convince my boss to sign off on. So I went to Paris first.
Paris in January with a strong umbrella and a good sense of humour when the umbrella just ended up in knots in the wind. Don’t go to Paris in January! But it was the only chance I had. And the Australian had made me take the metro all the time while we sat underground and he dissed Paris the entire time so I knew I had to take the city back on my own terms…
I live in a city where it is famous for rain so I will always have fond memories of walking the streets of Paris in the rain with my broken umbrella… No Aussie jackass to spoil my love of the city of light and a budding romance a few days away in Deutschland. It could have been a film 😉
And in the photo montage, no doubt I would have been buying my first Hermes scarf. When I was traveling with the Aussie dude on my very first trip to Paris, I was traveling on $50 a day and there wasn’t really money for postcards… so it was a promise to myself… someday… I would return to Paris and buy a real Hermes scarf… at the shop on Faubourg St Honore.
The first experience was just OK. I was easily intimidated by the sales associate and walked away with something… but the true satisfaction that should have come from such an expensive purchase had always eluded me… so, in the end, my second Hermes scarf not only marked my 50th year but also bookended my European marriage – and highlighted how far I had come in the past 15 years.
This time I was confident and in charge of the sales associate, rather than vice versa, and walked away with a gorgeous scarf that should end up bequeathed in my will.
I’m not sure if I am “that girl”, “the new girl” or simply “this girl”. But, what is clear to me is the journey I have already undertaken and the confidence the “current girl” has.
It is the confidence of age and experience, worn lightly, making an Hermes scarf seem heavy by comparison.
This trip was practical. I wasn’t a tourist. There was no requirement for stories or adventures. And – compared to most of my travels – it was pretty low-key. But, in an effort to stay awake and combat jet lag on Friday night, I wandered into one of those bar-lounge-bistro-etc type places that only exist in France and was rewarded with more than just a 3 euro glass of great Cote du Rhone.
They had seemed determined I should sit… so ended up at a table almost in the lap of the guy strumming guitar and singing the kind of French chansons you would normally hear on the soundtrack of a film festival selection at Cannes.
I was happy to just listen but he kept smiling at me… in that come hither way that Latin guys have that is deadly… and he was a shaggy haired piece of French manhood with a great voice and a seductive delivery…
I gathered the table next to me was composed of his close friends, who spoke almost no English. I really need to work on my language skills! It was all not very clear… but it seemed I might be being set up with one of their friends who spoke English… Chanteur guy seemed sad I was leaving… and there may have been an interesting story there if I had stayed but sometimes you have to be the girl who knows what she really needs is some sleep!
Don’t worry… it doesn’t happen very often 🙂 My goal is to make my real life surpass all the treacly TV episodes and prove that real people are cooler than anyone on TV – fiction or reality TV fact…
Stay tuned! 😉
what turns you on? ;)
You will either be relieved – or disappointed – but this is a G-rated post. We are finally back in London. At the rate I’m going I will be hitting Frankfurt airport again before I have dispensed with London… but I try to squeeze in some thoughts when I can…
So… the header relates to the small epiphany I had while I was roaming the cobblestones in East London, frequently lost or disorientated, but enjoying even those moments.
I live in a city where sport rules. People are fit. People do sport. People watch sport. People talk sport. I’m not anti-sport – and fitter than the average North American – but I always feel like a freak in my hometown.
Cause sport just doesn’t turn me on the way art does. I do enjoy the endorphin high from a good run – or the wonder of the landscape when you hike here in nature’s wonderland – but I am equally thrilled by a great building or awed by a visually and intellectually challenging piece of art.
So, without question, London turns me on 😉 Architecture, art, theatre, music – and some of the greatest intellectual achievements of mankind. Each trip is different – but I always come away knowing a little more – and having my worldview challenged – and reshaped.
http://www.tate.org.uk/visit/tate-modern
I’m not always sure what to make of modern art. There was a time when it seemed to be following the “Fifty Shades of Grey” route… it just needed to be shocking, not necessarily great art. I saw quite a few head scratching exhibits and came away convinced there was no way the general public was going to walk away enlightened and I just decided it was stupid art…
As this blog demonstrates, I am not afraid of having an opinion 🙂 And I am a huge fan of making the world a smarter place, but elitist bullshit designed for a clique that excludes most of the population… you will not be getting a “like” from me on facebook.
And art straddles that complex space. It is meant to be more than just pretty pictures. So, I will always be enamoured of the Impressionists… and they were shocking in their time. But I also love the idea of art as a vehicle to ask questions about – and hopefully change – society.
So I try to understand modern art. And definitely toss myself into its wake to see what happens…
And at the Unilever Series at the Tate stuff does happen! Sadly, this is the last year of it. And I just realized it was happening. I went to see some exhibits in the Tanks… hey, it sounded intriguing 🙂 They were OK – but what was more interesting was the history of the Unilever Series at the Tate.
A number of years ago now I went down a slide at the Tate. Not exactly what you usually do at a museum! And I tried to avoid it! 🙂 Because it wasn’t a slide made by an engineer… it was a slide made by an artist… so it looked like my cashmere sweater was not going to make it out alive…
But I had met these cool English guys at Whistler. One was an artist and the other an art aficionado so that was how I ended up at the Unilever Series. And they graciously offered to hold my sweater so I could go down the slide…
At the time I didn’t realize I was part of art history – and the Unilever Series! But it was one of the puzzle pieces in helping me understand modern art, the idea of conceptual art… The slide was meant to have people participate in the art… and you did… it was rough and not terribly slidey… German engineers would have designed it so that you went from the fourth floor to the ground in a couple of seconds! But then it wouldn’t have felt like an experience… worrying you might get stuck in the tube – and having to push yourself through at points – made it an experience… both for you and for the spectators watching you…
While I might have entered the slide reluctantly, this time I was trying to find the Unilever art… it’s meant to be conceptual and maybe not so obvious…
I had noticed on the way in there was a lot of movement in the Turbine Room… and some of it looked choreographed… but not in an obvious way… but after I’d spent my time in the Tanks, I stood and watched for a little while…
Obviously that was the “art” for 2012… random groups of dancers who looked like art students but then would spontaneously combust in a modern dance piece that had them moving fluidly amongst the crowd… being disconcerting but never actually touching someone.
I was thinking about trying to photograph it so was standing still for a while… when some older gentleman approached me…
Strangers talk to me all the time so I was suspicious right away… it was more like an actor’s monologue than a conversation. Apparently he and his wife had just moved into this “ready-made community” and they wanted them to join the local council. He went on for quite a while and it was strange – but entertaining. I wondered if I was being filmed 🙂
Finally he asked what I thought about “ready-made communities”. I think I might have made his day 🙂 I live in a city where planning is an important foundation of the metropolis so first we discussed that. The concept of zoning and approving development to “create a community” a concept I am very familiar with – and have seen work well.
But the most interesting part of the conversation was when I talked about the sense of community I experienced as a child growing up in a small town. It’s a genuine community. And, if you don’t want people to know your business – or expect you to participate in the community – a bad choice. But it also means the community keeps tabs and knows what is going on in a way that is really difficult in a large city like London.
So… in the end… he thanked me for the conversation… I walked away having not only SEEN the art – but having BEEN part of the art… and – most importantly – we agreed, if you want to be a badass criminal, you better move to the city… in proper communities, you will be sanctioned by your peers to behave better… kind of like how you can’t steal from your own grandmother… food for thought… what all great art should be…
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artsy stuff, social commentary, travel stories
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